By Ed Percival, Shirlaws UK Business Coach
You’ll be familiar with the game that is sometimes called the Drama Triangle, where the players adopt the roles of Victim, Persecutor or Rescuer.
Fuelled by fear, the game enables each player to eventually become the Victim.
Fear makes it easy for each player to give responsibility for their own behaviour to another of the players.
Playing in the game tends to be very draining for the players.
The roles become comfortable by their familiarity.
Role players get adept at arguing for the validity and continued existence of their role.
To enable a player to climb up out of their role, it seems their journey has to begin with awareness.
Holding a mirror to their behaviour their current role needs to survive is likely to be uncomfortable for the player and for you if you’re facilitating the evolution.
Until they can become aware of the damage their current behaviour is having and take responsibility for it, nothing is likely to change.
Once you encourage them past denial and they are finally persuaded to accept responsibility for their creations, their trip has begun.
As they continue to accept responsibility for creating something worthwhile, build their ability to acknowledge themselves.
This seems to build the bridge between the roles of Victim and Creator.
Creator accepts responsibility for creating the whole of their reality.
Responsibility has shifted from “them” to “me”.
Once you have succeeded with Victims, deploy the same strategy with
Perpetrators to Challengers and Rescuers to Coaches.
After all, as Ray Bell said “ It’s all the same stuff”
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